This place matters

This place matters

Monday, September 26, 2011

Not Smooberry

Bill Casselman, author of Where a Dobdob Meets a Dikdik, whom you may remember as the man who inspired this inane post, wants you to know that there is a word that rhymes with orange. And he's mad as hell "hebetudinous nincompoops" who would say otherwise. Okay, the "hebetudinous nincompoops" are the ones who claim there's no rhyme for purple. The people who claim there is no rhyme for orange are merely "letterless yahoos" and "Internet dullards." 
And just to break in for a moment, I'm on the seventh page, including the introduction, and he's used "letterless" as an insult twice. If his vocabulary is so giant, you'd think he'd be able to come up with a greater variety of insults. Now who's the hebetudinous nincompoop? I wouldn't know. I have no idea what hebetudinous means. Or didn't until I just looked it up. It means dumb.
Because the cool kids will respect you more if you insult them using a big word. Trust me, I would know, I did it all the time. Round about fifth grade, I would have killed for a word like hebetudinous to verbally vivisect the viperous, vile villains who tormented me (looks like Casselan's not the only one with a thesaurus). 
I don't think this is a periwinkle flower. But what do I know?
Anyway, I know you're waiting with painful presentiment to learn the age old mystery. The word that rhymes with orange is sporange. Of course, sporange! A sporange is another name for sporangium, which is a botanical term for a pod that holds spores. Also, turple, which means to fall down an die, rhymes with purple. Silver has my favorite rhyme: dicky dilver. Which is a nickname for the periwinkle flower. 

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